Tuesday, October 7, 2008

A conglomeration.....

Two elderly women were eating breakfast in a restaurant one morning. Ethel noticed something funny about Mabel's ear and she said, '"Mabel, do you know you've got a suppository in your left ear?" Mabel answered, "I have a suppository in my ear?" She pulled it out and stared at it. Then she said, "Ethel, I'm glad you saw this thing. Now I think I know where to find my hearing aid."

SOUL: said.

you think YOU have altzheimers? it took me a full minute to remember wth a CAPE is!! ugh

Anonymous Anonymous said...

No, you do not have Alzheimers. You were just distracted. My spice opens her mouth for 10 seconds, then closes it because she forgets what she was going to say. Being forgetful is misplacing your car keys. Alzheimers is placing your car keys in the microwave and cooking them for 12 minutes.

Alzheimer's really is a big fear of mine because my mother died from it ,and she was quite young when she got it.I admit ,it does have it's funny moments though. I used to bring my mother here for a few days at a time. She was totally obsessed with her damn pills. She would always accuse me of not giving her the right ones, not giving her the right amount etc. This usually ended with her insisting that I call her nurse ,so she could tell on me. She also woke up at 4 or 5 in the morning.....yep ,you guessed it....saying it was time for her pills.

One morning at about 5 A.M. I woke up because I had that feeling that I was being watched.Well, there she was in my bedroom ,just standing there (probably scared to wake me up) she was wearing some jeans and a black bra.I look at her ,through my half closed eyes and notice that she has kleenex hanging out the top of her bra.

I said "what you got in that bra, toilet paper?"

Without a seconds hesitation .....she says

" No, these are REAL!"

Bwa ha ha! Bless her crazy little heart. that was damn funny.


On to the cat post and doctor post comments.....

Brad said...

I was going to ask the same thing. How in the hec did you take those pics ?

Can't you just adopt that little guy and add him into the pack? I bet hubby wouldn't even notice!

Brad, you hold your stubby little arm as far above your head as possible and click:)

I think when my husband had to pay a fortune to ship the little guy to england ,it would be a dead giveaway. dang it.

Anonymous Mental Gas said...

Made me long for disco, tube tops and pants that I had to lay down to zip up. How the hell did I breath in high school??
I love YOUR writing.

Mental, I have a picture of you somewhere ,at a high school dance with a boy in a blue leisure suit. LOL
I also have one of the two of us rockin' some gauchos. *cringe*

Remember going to the skating rink ,and we would leave our pants unzipped until we got there, to ensure that they would be skin tight.

Whoo, damn we must have been hot.....er.... rediculous looking. :)

Blogger Golden To Silver Val said...

That era was not my favorite for clothing either. I'm a sweatshirt/leggings type of gal. I just feel comfy like that...sorry.
I'm so glad that you're ok and its not the dreaded L word. Are you sure this doc isn't related to House? Sounds like his manner is close. Even though I enjoy the show...if I had a doctor talk to me like that, I would collapse in a pool of frightened tears and then never see him again.

Charolette, I also dress sexy like that.LOL

I would cry as well if Dr. house talked to me. But sometimes I do wish I had a doctor with a whole team like that so they would actually get things done.

Which is the reason I do like MY doctor. He's the first one I've had in years that does anything.
I just have to get the sweetness from my dentist. He actually called me Dearheart one day.
Who says that? :)


Cavuto woke me up at 3:30 this morning , thinking it was time to get up. WTH?

People have asked me "why don't you just lock him out of your bedroom?"

Ha! you funny naive people. He is strong enough to rip the carpet right up off the floor . That's why.Hell, he could probably break the door down too.


Only 2 more days until my trip to Chicagoland. Woo Hoo!

Since we have pretty much seen all there is to see IN Chicago , well all that doesn't cost a fortune anyhow.We are going to take a day trip up to Milwaukee and see the Titanic exhibit. I'm pretty excited about that.

The kids plan to go to this indoor go kart racing place. I read about it and watched some videos on youtube. Um...I don't think I'll be doing that.

I'll stick to watching .Thank you.

I'm pretty sure Weis will bring his laptop. So if we have internet ,I'll be updating with more pictures that ya'll ever wanted to see. I'm obsessed with the picture taking.

I'm also obsessed with packing, early. I feel compelled to go finish packing now:)

Have a great day peeps!

Luv me


Anonymous said...

If I borrowed a laptop for my trip to Heber, do you just log on to your log on info? We went to Memphis a few years ago to see the Titanic exhibit. Loved it! I bought a little brass hourglass. TWENTY bucks! But, it has front row seat to my collection. Like the tiny purple cows you and soul gave me; being so small makes them extra special. Going to ft smith today to pick up my car, which they found nothing wrong! 2 other places agreed it was leaking but they weren't liscensed to do warrenty work! ack! aj

Brad said...

Your right, anyone who advises to simply lock the cat out has never owned a cat. He is pretty dang cute though.


The Ex and I had an apartment there at 34th & Halsted - 1000 years ago. I worked in Seattle at the time. It was intersting. Nothing like landing at O'Hara and taking the El at midnight to a frozen city and walking 12 blocks -blech!

Anonymous said...

Declaw the cat. Then he can whine and moan all night long on the other side of the door and Smocha can get some sleep. I will never understand women. I guess the day I do is when the fun will stop. Women will squeeze into tight pants but if you look them over you get this 'WTH are you lookin at?' Same thing with tight sweaters over nice boobs. Don't lose eye contact or they get insulted. "If you don't want me buy no bacon, then don't open the sto." G5

Anonymous said...

Best mattress there is the Select Comfort. Just dial in the softness or firmness you like and sleep away. Spice and I were married for 25 years before we discovered that she likes a very soft,featherbed type mattress and I like a mattress that is as hard as dirt. Now each side of our Select Comfort has its own dial and it is a great sleep. G5