Pass the cat prozac....

Hi ya'll,

I spoke to the Vet and they said they can probably give Monkey some shock therapy. ( ha , just kidding) They said they can probably find something to help her anxiety.
The Burmese rescue lady also emailed me and said she has a single lady who would love to have Monkey if the vet can't help her.I can't just let the dumb girl starve herself to death. Gah!





That same morning, before I called the vet I see a smaller version of THIS!

(that is what Cavuto did to his stomach while he was in quarantine)


He's doing it again. apparently Monkey is not the only stressed out cat.




So Monkey AND Cavuto will be going to the vet Friday when hubby is here with the car.

Why can't any of our pets just be normal? LOL



********************************************************************



Saturday we DID go to the oak furniture store (for the hundredth time) we looked , we debated , we BOUGHT!


Kind of looks like something someone threw together in the back yard ,doesn't it?
They all look like this.







It has 2 extensions that hide inside the table.


The chairs were hideous and uncomfortable . We looked at every chair in the place. I sat in chairs, we debated, we hemmed, we hawed and we finally realized that we love our chairs back at home.












In the end we bought just 2 chairs. (for now) it's not like we're going to be having any dinner parties. We don't know any body.


So we got these 2 el-cheapo yet sort of comfortable chairs.


After all that ... and all that money....then the
salesman says" it should be delivered in about 3 weeks"


3 weeks! damn ,you know I hate waiting.







Some how that big ole table must fit in THIS little space.


The stroller is about to be put away for the winter :(

This place is a crackerbox.

*********************************************************************





We also went to Sainsbury (the grocery store)
that place was so packed I have never seen anything like it.

the picture just doesn't do it justice.







*****************************************************************************

Our weather has been absolute crap for days and days......the wind blowing like a frekin hurricane,pouring rain. And remember "I " get to walk everywhere. :(










It was only a matter of time before I had to get myself some British wellies.









Yesterday was my day to stay home and clean and do laundry all day .Yippeee!!!


So today, I'm outa heah. Off to the big town of Fareham.


Have a great day peeps!

luv me

Random crap and a surprise ending.......

Hi y'all,


Is this Tuesday or Wednesday? Hmmm....Hell, I don't know.
Anyhow, yesterday I took the bus to Fareham to do some shopping and go to the library. There's a big indoor shopping center there ,but there never seems to be enough time.


Here's how it goes. I leave here around 10 , walk to the bus stop. The bus arrives and then takes about half an hour to get there. Then ,I have to be waiting for the bus back by 2 ,so I can take THAT bus and get dropped off by Cavutos place. Then I go see him and then walk home from there.


So, like I said, I barely had any time to shop. I was mostly searching for WARM things! Like turtlenecks ,sweaters and warm socks that would cover my entire body. I did not find any of those things.
But I did get a couple pairs of British jeans at a thrift store. Not sure yet if they will fit on me or not. I have no idea what size clothes I wear here.I'll find out in 2 days after they dry . lol





On the days that I do not take a bus any where I must walk to and from the quarantine place.


Like today.


Believe me, if I could get my hands on THIS outfit, I'd be wearing it!








Where was I going with all that?



Oh yeah, Monday when I went and saw Cavuto ,he looks and sounds so sad and lonely. I sat there bawling (as usual) for the entire visit.

Monday night I (while bawling, as usual) told my hubby "I can not take 6 months of it."

He said " I know ,I can't stand it either."









Look at this knucklehead.


Where could he be , to be sleeping in such contentment?












Ha! on daddy's back.

Sleeping through happy hour.













You saw it here folks.
A Crazy cat man.







Some random crap:




When I poured out my first bag of frozen spinach I found that it was frozen into these little muffin shapes.

How convenient.(for portioning)









Fancy a brew?

You know you do!

(how's that fro some crappy advertising?)

Those are actually little tiny splenda pills.
It takes 6 of them to sweeten a cup of coffee.

I'm probably dying of Splenda over dosage as we speak.










Look how short (and bland) the paper towels are.

I find myself not wanting to use them because I will run out so soon.











Ok , I saved THIS for last.


The wheels are in motion. As soon as we figure out all the details ,Cavuto and I are going home!


Have a great day peeps!

Luv me

A conglomeration.....

Two elderly women were eating breakfast in a restaurant one morning. Ethel noticed something funny about Mabel's ear and she said, '"Mabel, do you know you've got a suppository in your left ear?" Mabel answered, "I have a suppository in my ear?" She pulled it out and stared at it. Then she said, "Ethel, I'm glad you saw this thing. Now I think I know where to find my hearing aid."







SOUL: said.

you think YOU have altzheimers? it took me a full minute to remember wth a CAPE is!! ugh

Anonymous said...

No, you do not have Alzheimers. You were just distracted. My spice opens her mouth for 10 seconds, then closes it because she forgets what she was going to say. Being forgetful is misplacing your car keys. Alzheimers is placing your car keys in the microwave and cooking them for 12 minutes.

Alzheimer's really is a big fear of mine because my mother died from it ,and she was quite young when she got it.I admit ,it does have it's funny moments though. I used to bring my mother here for a few days at a time. She was totally obsessed with her damn pills. She would always accuse me of not giving her the right ones, not giving her the right amount etc. This usually ended with her insisting that I call her nurse ,so she could tell on me. She also woke up at 4 or 5 in the morning.....yep ,you guessed it....saying it was time for her pills.



One morning at about 5 A.M. I woke up because I had that feeling that I was being watched.Well, there she was in my bedroom ,just standing there (probably scared to wake me up) she was wearing some jeans and a black bra.I look at her ,through my half closed eyes and notice that she has kleenex hanging out the top of her bra.



I said "what you got in that bra, toilet paper?"



Without a seconds hesitation .....she says

" No, these are REAL!"







Bwa ha ha! Bless her crazy little heart. that was damn funny.


*******************************************************************************

On to the cat post and doctor post comments.....

Brad said...

I was going to ask the same thing. How in the hec did you take those pics ?

Can't you just adopt that little guy and add him into the pack? I bet hubby wouldn't even notice!

Brad, you hold your stubby little arm as far above your head as possible and click:)

I think when my husband had to pay a fortune to ship the little guy to england ,it would be a dead giveaway. dang it.

Mental Gas said...

WOW THOSE MODELS LOOKED LIKE "THE DATING GAME" REJECTS...LOL
Made me long for disco, tube tops and pants that I had to lay down to zip up. How the hell did I breath in high school??
I love YOUR writing.

Mental, I have a picture of you somewhere ,at a high school dance with a boy in a blue leisure suit. LOL
I also have one of the two of us rockin' some gauchos. *cringe*

Remember going to the skating rink ,and we would leave our pants unzipped until we got there, to ensure that they would be skin tight.

Whoo, damn we must have been hot.....er.... rediculous looking. :)


Golden To Silver Val said...

That era was not my favorite for clothing either. I'm a sweatshirt/leggings type of gal. I just feel comfy like that...sorry.
I'm so glad that you're ok and its not the dreaded L word. Are you sure this doc isn't related to House? Sounds like his manner is close. Even though I enjoy the show...if I had a doctor talk to me like that, I would collapse in a pool of frightened tears and then never see him again.

Charolette, I also dress sexy like that.LOL

I would cry as well if Dr. house talked to me. But sometimes I do wish I had a doctor with a whole team like that so they would actually get things done.

Which is the reason I do like MY doctor. He's the first one I've had in years that does anything.
I just have to get the sweetness from my dentist. He actually called me Dearheart one day.
Who says that? :)

********************************************************************************

Cavuto woke me up at 3:30 this morning , thinking it was time to get up. WTH?

People have asked me "why don't you just lock him out of your bedroom?"

Ha! you funny naive people. He is strong enough to rip the carpet right up off the floor . That's why.Hell, he could probably break the door down too.

*******************************************************************************

Only 2 more days until my trip to Chicagoland. Woo Hoo!

Since we have pretty much seen all there is to see IN Chicago , well all that doesn't cost a fortune anyhow.We are going to take a day trip up to Milwaukee and see the Titanic exhibit. I'm pretty excited about that.

The kids plan to go to this indoor go kart racing place. I read about it and watched some videos on youtube. Um...I don't think I'll be doing that.

I'll stick to watching .Thank you.

I'm pretty sure Weis will bring his laptop. So if we have internet ,I'll be updating with more pictures that ya'll ever wanted to see. I'm obsessed with the picture taking.


I'm also obsessed with packing, early. I feel compelled to go finish packing now:)


Have a great day peeps!

Luv me

Guest post, rotten cats and un-pc-ness

A conversation with my cat.........

me: "um, excuse me, I can't see the computer."






"Um, excuse ME, but I am reading this."













me: "It's MY computer.Move it!."






"What? I can't even hear you. "









me: "I'm gonna tell."





"go ahead, Daddy likes me best."









Me:"I'm not kidding ,MOVE!"







"Figaro...figaro...figaro......"












Me:" I'm telling."

**********************************************************************

My husband seems to be fine. He is sore from his tumble ,but hopefully ok.
He was going to go home (to England) early. But could not change his flight. So he is staying in Sweden at a friends house. I am glad because the friend will be there to notice if he starts showing signs of a head injury. :)


BTW, He was not drunk. My first question was "how do you know you didn't faint?"

Of course he does not know, because he can't remember the fall. But he is claiming to have tripped on the new shoes I bought him. (Likely story) lol


My post about his fall was supposed to be funny. (even though I am worried sick)
I guess my sarcastic wit is above some peoples heads. (or ,maybe I am just too damn sarcastic)


Last night my neighbor ,Dr. Man rang the doorbell wanting to know how hubby got an epidural hematoma. I said "No, I was just saying it was possible. Because he did NOT go to the doctor afterwards. "


Sorry for the confusion.

****************************************************************************
I realize that I sometimes say things that may seem un-PC. I am sorry about that, I do not mean to offend anyone. That's just the way things roll sometimes.

I promised a guest post by my eldest son.....and here is PART 1:

Disclaimer:I have nothing against gay people ,and neither does my son. It just happens to come up sometimes. Just like the white trash ,black chick I had to sit next to at the beauty shop. But that's a whole 'nother story. :)
*****************************************************************************

Ok.....Presenting

Part 1:Weis's trip to the big Apple

Prologue:

This trip is to be my third trip to New York City. I’ve always wanted to go to a taping of the Conan O’Brien show, but it’s really tough to get tickets! By some miracle, Bonnie has procured them this time! Holy Crap!! The only catch is the taping doesn’t leave much time afterwards for me to get to my plane. I decide not to check any bags in order to save time at the airport.

I have learned to accept the fact that I simply will not get any sleep the night before taking a trip of almost any kind. It’s a fact of life. I’m ok with it... Sort of.

Bonnie says that it’s likely to be chilly in the city. I’m pretty thrilled about the idea of cool weather after the hellish Florida summer. I pack one pair of shorts and 2 pair of jeans (a third pair which I’m wearing on the way there). Two whole pairs of jeans take up about 2/3 the space in my tiny carry-on suitcase. I don’t think I’ve ever packed so light in my life. It’s kinda nice actually.

I’m all “packed” before 10pm.. Wow! Usually I’m not finished until 2am. I take a shower and then I decide to start copying videos to my laptop and music to my iphone. I update to the latest itunes and there’s a cool new way to make playlists! I separate my stupid gels and liquids into a quart-sized zip-loc baggie. I carefully decide which pills I should bring. Allergy meds, check. More powerful allergy meds, check. Caffeine pills, check. Sleeping pills, check. Nyquil, check. Dayquil, check. Multi-vitamin, check. Antacids, check. (you never know what tiny ailment will ruin your vacation!!) I go over my inventory, itinerary and anal-retentatively confirm that I haven’t forgotten a single detail.

What do you know? It’s now 1am!!!

I finally lay down to sleep after setting my alarm for 4:45am. I toss and turn for what seems like an eternity. I can hear my roommates talking in the other room. I can tell they are being very quiet, but my amplified insomnia hearing allows me to hear every rat fart in a ten mile radius!

Finally I manage to fall asleep and am immediately awoken by my alarm.

Friday:

I spring from my bed and start my normal routine of coffee and breakfast.

My mouth is scorched from eating pizza for dinner the night before. Scorch-mouth makes even the most delicious coffee taste like bile. I drink it anyway! I toss my 2 small bags and coat into the car and head to my friend, Scott’s house. He lives pretty close to the airport. Scott drives me to the airport in my car. I jump out with my coat and luggage. I pre-printed my boarding pass so I don’t even have to check-in!

I get on the plane and try to sleep. I’m unsuccessful for the most part, however I do manage to doze off just long enough to be jolted awake by the gum in my mouth. Fortunately I didn’t a) choke on it or b) wake up with it smeared all over my face and hair.

The plane lands in Newark, NJ and it’s a frigid 68 degrees. No need to wait for my checked baggage.. A nice touch! I step outside and Bonnie pulls up in a matter of minutes. She informs me that she also got about 2 hours of sleep the night before. We communicate in mostly grunts, sighs and shrugs as we make our way into the city in our sleep deprived states. We pull up to Ramya’s apartment building in Manhattan’s Upper West Side. I elect to help Ramya bring our luggage up while Bonnie watches the car. (Parking is out of the question)

Ramya comes out of the building and we load up with luggage, board games, blankets and pillows. I have all these games balanced perfectly on my suitcase and slowly start wheeling it into the lobby. Two women have just finished smoking. One of them helps me pull my ridiculous load up the step while the other one pretty much heckles me. “It’s going to be awful when that scrabble game spills all over the floor.” “It sure is going to be fun to clean up blah blah blah.” The dumb hag’s heckling causes me to speed up my pace, which of course, sends the pile of board games toppling over on the lobby floor. “I knew that was going to happen blah blah blah.” The less haggish of the two women helps me pick up the uno cards and we left the games on the front desk while we lugged the rest into the tiny elevator and up to the 11th floor.

Back down to the car, Bonnie and I head to Queens to find a parking spot. Her friend, Vinnie lives there and there’s usually ample parking. When we arrive, we quickly realize that the ample parking is only there on the weekends. On a Friday, there’s nowhere to park! We finally find a spot after circling for about 30 minutes. We get on the subway and make our way back to Ramya’s apartment. We stop at a mini grocery store to get some coffee (they have a name for this kind of store, but I can’t remember what it is). They were having a special on overripe bananas.. Only 35 cents!

We meet Ramya at a place called city grill for lunch. We are quite ravenous. I ordered a chicken club sandwich. It was pretty decent, except for the hard ass bread, which wasn’t very pleasant against my scorch-mouth!

After lunch, we go back to Ramya’s apartment. I change into my only pair of shorts and pass out for a nap while Bonnie and Ramya go boot shopping. They return without any boots. We chill out and watch a couple episodes of “It’s always sunny in Philadelphia.” Bonnie gets ready to go to the Hayden concert. I put on my shoes and we’re off.

We make it to happy hour at this place called “nice guy eddies.” Thus begins a night of too many beers. After that, we head to Bowery Ballroom for the Hayden concert and we are way early! As soon as we walk in, Hayden is at the bar. I figure I’ll have plenty of opportunities to talk to him, so I don’t bother. After that he disappears... Blast! We’re super early, so we might as well keep drinking!

Finally, Hayden takes the stage and the show is phenomenal. He plays a nice mixture of old and new songs. A great time is had by all. After Hayden is done, Juliana Hatfield is playing. We leave before she goes on. We meet up with Edward at this vegetarian Thai restaurant. On a side note: Bonnie and all of her friends are vegetarian. Edward is vegan (super vegetarian). This is the first of many vegetarian dining experiences.

My pseudo-chicken curry is pretty damn good. I ordered it extra spicy and they didn’t disappoint! Edward heads back to his place and Bonnie and I go off to continue our drunken rampage. After we separate, Bonnie and I start bickering about whether or not Edward is pretentious and/or gay. We stumble into a random bar so Bonnie can use the bathroom. We have more beers. We head for this karaoke place called lemongrass. We order beers and these lesbians start to sing “come to my window” by Melissa Etheridge. It is just about the worst thing either of us have ever heard. We quickly down our drinks and head to the next stop. We find what appears to be a regular sports bar, but they are playing ambiguously gay 80’s music. There are very very few females in there and a bartender with an Irish accent. Bonnie and I determine that it’s a gay sports bar. Who knew?

We have a couple beers here and finally stumble back to Ramya’s apartment. The Edward debate rages on pretty much the whole time. Bonnie and I both like to argue. Especially when drunk.

We made it to Ramya’s in one piece!!! It’s a miracle! I make my bed on the couch and Bonnie jumps in bed with Ramya. Side note: Ramya’s sleep schedule is that of an 80 year old married couple, so she goes to bed at 9:30 and wakes up at 6am!!

To be continued....

I'm up now.......

Hi'ya Peeps,

This morning my phone rang at 3:40 A.M. ack! I immediately thought it was my youngest son, drunk and fighting with his brother. You never know at 3 A.M. so I had to answer it.

Much to my relief , that was not the case. He had just gotten home from picking up Gidget at work,checked his email and found out his mommy was sad. (yeah , when he's old ,he'll wait 'til morning to call and check on me)

I guess it's been awhile since I spoke to him. He is now back in school ,his business is thriving and they are both just doing so great for two kids "doing it the hard way".There they were at 3A.M. ,just getting off work,giving the ferrets their vitamins.

I'm so proud of you guys! But really, it's ok to wait until morning to call me.
I can't wait 'til they get married:) We could not have found a better "daughter" if we'd been able to go find her ourselves.


***********************************************************************
Yesterday I busted ass working ,mostly on my overstuffed closet.I narrowed down my summer clothes/shoes/bags down to 3 small boxes.


I have 2 giant hefty bags ready for goodwill and Eva happened to stop by , so I gave her all the better stuff.I am not taking any clothes to England that need to be ironed. It will be bad enough having to use the clothes line. Ha!


Today I get to go up into the attic and repeat the whole process with my winter wardrobe.
We have those pull down ladder type stairs, which scare the crap out of me. I can go up ok but I'm scared to death to go down. Especially while carrying boxes. I usually roll the boxes down the ladder and hope there's nothing breakable in them.


Note to self:Quit buying clothes, you crackhead!

*******************************************************************************
Night before last I made the most hideous dinner ever! I have this recipe where you brown some smoked sausage ,an onion and a bell pepper. Then you heat it all up in au jus and serve it on a toasted french roll .(like a french dip)

Well ,I did not have any au jus mix but I did have a packet of brown gravy mix. I figured it may be similar.

NOT! OMG! It was sooo gross ,it was actually nauseating.

Last night when Eva left it was 7 o clock. I look around to see what I have for dinner. Ugh....Nothing except those disgusting leftovers.

I got the brilliant plan to throw it all in the colander, turn on the sprayer and rinse the damn gravy off of it. Then I heated it all up with a can of sauerkraut .

Imagine my surprise when it turned out awesomely delicious! WOO HOO!

Next time, I'm making it like that to begin with. Bon appetite :)

******************************************************************************

I have no pictures to post today. It seems so bland without them.








"Do I look stupid?"
















"Not as stupid as me."







I hope to get my chores done and be on the boat this afternoon.

Have a great Saturday Ya'll!

Luv me

Cat's all folks...

All little of this ...a little of that....

Hi Y'all ,

Yep, once again I am wayyy behind on posting.
Everything has been either boring or annoying lately.


It has been scorching hot . 110 with the heat index. Then in the afternoons horrendous thunderstorms. The other day I was literally trapped at the grocery store. I stepped outside and waited ,with about 30 other people . Lighting was flashing all over the parking lot.Thunder was booming ,little kids were screaming in fear.And the water was about a foot deep ,up to the doors on some cars..







Safely inside the truck at last.






*****************************************************************************


Monday ,I got to go have my teeth cleaned. You know ...the deep cleaning where they chisel under your gums. The hygienist is this huge 7 foot tall old lady ,about 65 years old. She has a giant booming cackle to go with her persona. I tell her "they usually numb me to do this."

"They usually charge a hundred times more money for it too. You can take it." CACKLE CACKLE CACKLE!

I grip the arms of the chair in terror and make hideous pain faces ,contortions I didn't know my face was capable of making.

She proceeds to scrape the bones out of my face ,while she cackled and cackled.

Then she had to pry my white knuckled fingers off the arms of the chair so I could leave.
She CACKLED the whole time.

No wonder I put this off for the last 3 years!

**************************************************************************
I have wracked my brain about the possibility of leaving the cats with someone so I could just go to England. The very idea of them forgetting me or missing me, is totally heart breaking. Then , who could I trust anyway? I actually DO have one neighbor that I could trust with them. But then I try out the proposition in my mind.


" Um...hey neighbor, would you like to watch my cats for 5 months?You don't mind cats walking all over your counters and stove, right? Or petting themselves on your cooking utensils?
They're no trouble, really. Cavuto will wake you at 5 or 6 A.M. so you can go turn on the bathtub faucet . He refuses to drink any other way.Then him and Monkey will arrive in the kitchen for their whipped cream. They usually like a little cream in the evening too.It won't be any bother. they'll wait until you're all settled on the couch before Monkey begins her loud ,demanding, bitchy screaming. O'reilly ,why he's no trouble at all ...you don't mind cats jumping on your shoulder every time you bend over or use the toilet, right? He only leaves bloody gashes down your back or arms if he misses the jump and falls .If Cavuto is awake , he demands your constant attention. He is just so happy to be alive ,he likes to share the joy by having you carry him around like a baby.You'll also have to cut his nails. He hates it really ,but after he shreds you to pieces the first few times, it'll be gravy baby.You'll also need to baby proof your blinds every day when you open them ,because Cavuto gets hung in them sometimes. He's also prone to seizures when he is hanging upside down in blind cords. Oh yeah, and O'reilly does have that little vomiting problem. It's not vomit really, more like he just regurgitates chewed up cat food ,it won't even stain your carpet. If it's really vomit , you'll see him walking backwards in circles. He only does that when he chews on things he shouldn't ,like fake plants and pine needles .Oh, he also likes to play fetch around midnight. You'll know when he brings you a bread wrapper and starts flinging it around all over your bed.It's fun really, you'll learn to love it!
They also like to watch their "birdy" movie sometimes ,just set up a barstool for them in front of the t.v. ,you DO have a flat screen right? They prefer a flat screen."


Let's face it. I am so NOT going to England until the cats wait is OVER!
NOT HAPPENING!










And looks so innocent.
Big huge annoying little pain in the ass.






****************************************************************************
Yesterday was our anniversary. I'll be going out to dinner Friday night with my friend Eva to celebrate.




Happy anniversary my sexy man!

I love you!











Have a great day in your worlds. Laters me

Boys will be boys.........

Happy Monday Peeps!




















































































"What? I'm too sexy for this floor?"